So, you’re sitting in your living room, watching your favorite TV show or playing your game and suddenly you get a message that you have a new match on Tinder. One thing leads to another and there you are, setting a date. Then, you overthink everything, especially if you lack self-confidence, and you probably think that you will not land a second one. Well, let’s start by first calming down, and secondly – the things that you do during your first date will definitely affect the second one, or at least the option of a second date.
However, there are a couple of tips that can help you in making sure the girl (or guy for that matter) will go with you on a second date. This is how to impress your date and come off as a strong, independent and funny guy that you are.
Pre-tip: Calm down
So, obviously, the first tip is to calm down. You will achieve nothing by being nervous – this is a normal occurrence, but try to breathe and think positively. The main goal is for you to be yourself, so do not let nervousness be an obstacle. Dates always happen, and know that there will be good dates and bad dates, so try to embrace the possibility of a bad date, hoping for the best, and go there without worrying at all. Playing it cool is definitely a good way to go. However, if you need help gaining confidence and learning how to date with success, a dating coach can help.
1. Talk about interesting topics
The first thing you need to do once you get on the date is start the conversation with an interesting topic. Some conversation starters, such as “Where do you come from”, “Where did you go to school” or “What is your favorite movie” can be good options, but bear in mind that they are a bit cliché. This is why it is always good to start with an anecdote of what happened to you on the way to the date, or start with an interesting question about her personal life. Ask about what her favorite color is, where she likes to travel, or share stories from your own trips. These are always interesting.
2. Pick the right place
The place where you will have your first date is vital for the chance of a second one. This is why you have to think outside of the box just a little bit, and avoid all the cliché places where guys take the girl. Also, you might want to think about the aesthetic game of the specific place and if that place corresponds to your and her nature (as you have judged thus far). This might be a bit difficult if you live in a place that is crowded with amazing and interesting restaurants, such as Los Angeles or Sydney, for example. In the case of the latter, you can always pick some of the most interesting restaurants in Easter Suburbs that are so aesthetically pleasing that you will have the time of your life simply sitting there in silence and doing nothing but looking at each other and the environment.
3. Talking time
The time that you spend talking actually matters a lot. Not talking at all is never a good sign, but talking too much can also be quite annoying, and you might come off as bad-mannered, not talkative. Having 50-50 talking time is actually the best ratio. How will you manage this? By asking questions and listening to what the other side has to say. Always listen – this way, you will let her know that you are a good listener, which is a trait many girls love to see in a man.
4. Mind how you end the date
The end of the date is also quite important. It doesn’t matter if your date went very well, if you end it negatively, the chances of a second date are not very high. So, instead of actually saying “We should do this again”, let them know that you want to see them again. Be frank and open, and if you liked the date, let them know. Giving them the option of coming clean and saying if they want to see you or they “have something else planned but you will stay in touch” is also good as you will know if you can count on a second date or not.
5. After the date
Oh, the game of “who’s texting first”. The never-ending game of holding your phone and being completely nervous. So, in order to avoid this, be a guy and send a text first. Of course, we are not paying attention to sexes and letting genders dictate who should send the first text, but this is how you will make the waiting time shorter.
So, that is how it goes – pay attention to the details, do not be nervous, and you will land a second date. After all, it is because of yourself that she/he agreed to come to the first date, so if you show yourself in the most natural way and keep the conversation going without talking too much or too little, and being funny from time to time, you’re good to go. Good luck!