Love is in the air! You’ve been seeing someone a couple of times a week and this relationship feels different than the previous ones.
If that’s the case, you probably can’t help but start to imagine what your life will be together after you tie the knot. Does this relationship have the potential to make it the whole way?
Even if you don’t fully know the answer, there are questions that you can start to ask to catch a glimpse of that.
Here are several questions before marriage that you can use to see if you and your girlfriend or boyfriend are meant to be!
1. Do You Want to Have Children?
This is a powerful question, but one that shouldn’t be overlooked. While you may have a thought out plan for how many kids you want, your partner may not want any.
That’s not something that you’ll want to find out after you’ve said: “I do”.
Be sure to have a discussion about how many kids you both are hoping for and if there are any non-negotiables (such as continuing to try for a boy).
2. Do You Prioritize Your Health?
This one may seem a bit odd, but it’s worth asking to get an idea of the lifestyle you’ll live after marriage.
You want to find someone that’s going to push you to be healthy and even try new things such as a Gallant chiropractic adjustments. If you prioritize your health, you want to marry someone who does the same.
Many married couples can tell you that their spouse’s philosophy on health didn’t change after marriage. Either they were already passionate about it or shrugged it off.
3. How Did Your Parents Handle Arguments?
Want to know how your partner will handle arguments after you’re married and behind closed doors? Ask them how their parents used to handle arguments.
Odds are that they’re likely to take a thing or two from how they witnessed their parents handle tough situations growing up.
That’s not to say that they’ll be a carbon copy of what they grew up with, in fact, some may make a conscious effort to be different. Knowing this ahead of time helps you understand where they’re coming from. You can be their accountability.
4. Is There Anything Holding You Back?
In other words: do they have any hesitations with one day marrying you? These come in many different forms. Some of which may not be your fault at all.
For instance, some people are hesitant to get married, even with their soul mates because of their parents’ rough divorce. They try to avoid that pain again by never making the marriage commitment.
Getting a better understanding of their hesitations can start the discussion and help you both see if this thing has the legs to make it or not.
5. Do You Have Any Firm Beliefs on Marriage?
It’s unlikely that you’ll see eye-to-eye with your girlfriend or boyfriend on marriage right away. It’ll take time and discussion to reach a compromise.
There are some people that have preferences such as waiting until marriage to move in together or withholding sex until marriage.
There’s nothing wrong with either of those, as long as you’re both on the same page with it. If you’re actively opposed to one of their beliefs, or vice versa, then that’s an issue that needs to be discussed.
6. How Big a Role Does Religion Play in Your Life?
For some reason, this is a question that most people feel is too taboo to discuss with the person they’re dating.
However, it’s going to come up at some point and needs to be discussed before you get engaged. Maybe one of you is super religious and the other isn’t at all.
Perhaps you’re both religious but come from different backgrounds (EX: one of you is Lutheran, the other a Christian).
Don’t be afraid to discuss this. Be honest about your feelings towards this subject.
7. Do You See This Lasting Forever?
This question slices straight through the awkwardness and gets right to the point.
Are they interested in staying with you forever or not? If the answer is “no”, then there’s no point in continuing the relationship.
Holding on to a relationship where one of you doesn’t see it lasting forever only leads to further heartbreak down the line. Cut it off before it gets any harder to.
8. Do You Have Any Debt?
Many people have a debt of some sort to their name. Things like student loans, car payments, mortgages, etc.
If you intend on getting married to them, then guess what… those debts will quickly become your debts as well. Don’t let married life be the first time you hear about it.
Have an honest discussion about where your finances are, if you have any debts, how you budget your finances, etc. Also, take this time to discuss financial goals you have such as buying a home, buying a car, saving for a baby, etc.
Be Sure to Ask These Questions Before Marriage!
All of these questions before marriage will help provide a glimpse into whether or not the person you’re dating is right for you.
Some of them will be tough to ask, but there’s always a time and place for them, so wait until the time is right.
Be sure to read our other articles that pertain to both this topic and other topics that are just like it.